Desperate Houseflies: The Magazine

Feel free to pull out your trusty fly swatter and comment on what is posted here, realizing that this odd collection of writers may prove as difficult to kill as houseflies and are presumably just as pesky. “Desperate Houseflies” is a magazine that intends to publish weekly articles on subjects such as politics, literature, history, sports, photography, religion, and no telling what else. We’ll see what happens.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

Weeee Love You with the Looove of the Lorrrrd!

We love you with the LOOOVE of the Lorrrd. We seeeee in yoooou the glory of our- wait a minute. Not that guy.

See, how it works is, everybody's got a ministry. For some people, it's preaching. For others, it's singing or teaching or pie or building recording studios (don't ask). These folks, though, they make asses of themselves for Jesus. It's their ministry.

I really would like to meet Jesus, someday. He's hilarious.


Blogger Al Sturgeon said...

"...the Mississippi-based American Family Association..."


4:59 PM  
Blogger juvenal_urbino said...

They say there's no such thing as bad publicity.

5:17 PM  
Blogger Al Sturgeon said...

They also said there were WMDs in Iraq.

6:26 PM  
Blogger Terry Austin said...

A well-meaning woman in my office had stopped buying from Wal*Mart's website because an AFA "e-mail bulletin" led her to believe the megaretailer was donating part of its online sales proceeds to a G&L organization.

That sounded suspicious to me, so I tracked down the offending e-mail from AFA. It turned out that the AFA carefully crafted its message to make it appear that Wal*Mart was, in fact, doing what my co-worker thought. One had to read VERY carefully to understand that Wal*Mart was giving a portion of online purchases made through the G&L organization's website.

Surprise, surprise... those AFA bulletins (emphasis on the first syllable) circulate through our inboxes quite often. They're bwezy, which is also the word verification.

8:12 PM  
Blogger juvenal_urbino said...

Yep. Lying is how groups like AFA keep the faithful whipped up into a tizzy -- which, of course, is how groups like AFA get their money and their political influence.

They get away with it time after time (for decades, now) by relying on 2 traits of their supporters:

1. Their laziness.
2. Their addiction to being told they're right.

I know that sounds harsh, but it is what it is.

In Catholic theology, ignorance ameliorates (though doesn't excuse) responsibility for sin; if you really didn't know better, that's taken into account. However, willful ignorance exacerbates one's guilt. (They call it "vincible ignorance" or "affected ignorance.")

I think they're onto something, there.

I know there are people whose hearts are in the right place and just have had no educational opportunities and, therefore, instinctively trust "Christian" organizations to always tell them the truth. But frankly, they are extremely few and far between, and getting fewer and farther all the time.

If groups like AFA were dependent on those folks for their support, they would dry up and blow away tomorrow.

No, the AFA's of the world depend on the millions of relatively educated middle-class addicts. They manufacture those addicts' drug of choice: pride. Uncut, China-pure, black-tar pride. Its neurological effect is a sharp lowering of inhibitions and a long-lasting rush of exhiliration -- the thrill of a good fight, compounded exponentially by the certainty of being 100% on the side of the angels in that fight.

Scientists say crystal meth is the most addictive substance known to man. I bet they haven't tested the stuff AFA, etc., sells.

(Here endeth the rant. Sorry. Sore spot.)

11:52 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home

Locations of visitors to this page