The No A**hole Rule
I apologize for being so absent the past few weeks. I had an insane week at work two weeks ago and then I was out all last week. My friend Lucy got married this past Saturday and I was in my first wedding, in a fuchsia bridesmaid dress. (Lucy loves bright colors and had wanted a summer wedding, which scheduling issues did not permit). My hair did turn out well, though -- everyone was complimenting me on it, which I took as a sign that my hair usually looks like crap. :)
I also haven't had much to post on lately, but a colleague from work sent me a link to this blog post, a review of a new book with the above-mentioned title, and I thought, I need to go out and get this book. It is truly one of the most difficult parts of being a lawyer to have to deal with a**holes. (I include the asterisks out of respect for Al, who asked me not to curse on the blog in case his daughter reads it). And there are a lot of them. Occasionally they are clients, but most often they are your co-counsel or opposing counsel. Generally you get it most within your own workplace.
I've basically come to the conclusion that neither of my bosses has much respect for me, though one is definitely nicer than the other. The nicer one is the one I work with, the other one I have avoided since my last review when he said, in so many words, that he didn't think I was cut out to be a lawyer. It was a completely unfair assessment of me, and he gave no specific examples to support his assertion, which, in fairness, was phrased as a question of "whether I really wanted to do this work."
The truth is, in a lot of ways I'm not cut out to be a lawyer, but all of them are to my credit. I am honest, above board, and civil/kind in my dealings with people. I do not try to deceive through cleverness and I do not play dirty tricks. I have a hard time arguing a position when I don't believe in it personally or when I know the law is not on my side. I hate schmoozing (even if it's politely called "networking") and am terrible at it. I don't care about money and am more interested in helping people, which I have come to realize is not considered a valuable trait at my firm. I think the concept of the billable hour is an absurd way to evaluate employees, and as I've mentioned in a previous post, I believe in the 40 hour week, also not a popular view in the legal profession.
I don't know where I'm going with this, except to say that this post was sent by a colleague to all of the associates in my office. We're all in a bit of a funk about the direction of the firm. Fortunately, there is one saving grace -- we all like each other a lot and get along well. We just needed a little primer on how to deal with those we don't.
I also haven't had much to post on lately, but a colleague from work sent me a link to this blog post, a review of a new book with the above-mentioned title, and I thought, I need to go out and get this book. It is truly one of the most difficult parts of being a lawyer to have to deal with a**holes. (I include the asterisks out of respect for Al, who asked me not to curse on the blog in case his daughter reads it). And there are a lot of them. Occasionally they are clients, but most often they are your co-counsel or opposing counsel. Generally you get it most within your own workplace.
I've basically come to the conclusion that neither of my bosses has much respect for me, though one is definitely nicer than the other. The nicer one is the one I work with, the other one I have avoided since my last review when he said, in so many words, that he didn't think I was cut out to be a lawyer. It was a completely unfair assessment of me, and he gave no specific examples to support his assertion, which, in fairness, was phrased as a question of "whether I really wanted to do this work."
The truth is, in a lot of ways I'm not cut out to be a lawyer, but all of them are to my credit. I am honest, above board, and civil/kind in my dealings with people. I do not try to deceive through cleverness and I do not play dirty tricks. I have a hard time arguing a position when I don't believe in it personally or when I know the law is not on my side. I hate schmoozing (even if it's politely called "networking") and am terrible at it. I don't care about money and am more interested in helping people, which I have come to realize is not considered a valuable trait at my firm. I think the concept of the billable hour is an absurd way to evaluate employees, and as I've mentioned in a previous post, I believe in the 40 hour week, also not a popular view in the legal profession.
I don't know where I'm going with this, except to say that this post was sent by a colleague to all of the associates in my office. We're all in a bit of a funk about the direction of the firm. Fortunately, there is one saving grace -- we all like each other a lot and get along well. We just needed a little primer on how to deal with those we don't.
posted by Sandi | 12:51 PM
7 Comments:
It seems like maybe we had this conversation already, Sandi, but I'll say it anyway, since I've got nothing else to offer: maybe you're just not cut out to practice the kind of law you're practicing.
sorry to be redundant. I forget what I've said to whom about what. the short answer is, you're right, but I'm not in a position to leave just yet.
I feel your pain, Sandi. The atmosphere in an office or department can truly ruin a work experience (and life outside of work as well). One of the problems is that the environment of a law firm (or an academic department, in my case) seems to encourage (or attract) this type of behavior.
It's good you have collegues who feel the same way, though, as living in that type of environment by yourself would be deadly.
Hey Sandi! Missed having you around here (course I've been a bit absent myself)!
The book sounds interesting - the blog post gives a lot of lists with some interesting ideas.
In fact, this book might be very appropriate for churches, who often seem to have a disproportionate number of... ummm... interesting people to have to deal with.
:-)
Kind of wondering if anyone was going to bring up John Kerry's impersonation of Trent Lott?
:-)
I don't know about others, but I've been thoroughly burnt out on campaign stories for quite a while. Policy interests me, but electioneering just squicks me out.
Oh, and yes, nice to have you back, Sandi.
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